Ever meet with a client who doesn’t “get” the marketing copywriting process? A person who expects you to instantly create copy with little or no information?
Let’s see how New York Marketing Copywriter Woman deals with the situation.
New York Marketing Copywriter Woman Meets a Client Who Wants “Instant Copy.”
Place: Marketing Manager’s office at Mid-Sized Widgets, Inc.
Marketing Manager: Hey, New York Marketing Copywriter Woman. Yeah. Like I told you on the phone, I’m an outside-the-box strategic ninja working in a cubicle culture that doesn’t grok my cutting edge innovation.
New York Marketing Copywriter Woman: You said you were the marketing manager here at Mid-Sized Widget.
Marketing Manager: Exactly. So let’s not spin our wheels. As you can see from the yard-high stacks of Manila folders hiding my over-sized Formica desk, I’m very busy.
New York Marketing Copywriter Woman: How can I help you?
Marketing Manager: We need some targeted, strategic SEO, SEM web content that will enhance company image, blast sales and boost our bottom line. Can you deliver?
New York Marketing Copywriter Woman: Yes. But first, let me ask you a few questions.
Marketing Manager: Make it very few. As you can tell by the way I avoid eye contact, instead letting my attention wander throughout our meeting to my shiny computer screen and vibrating Blackberry—I’m beyond busy.
New York Marketing Copywriter Woman: I’ll be quick. What can you tell me about your product?
Marketing Manager: What’s to tell? We’re the leading provider of integrated solutions that cut through the clutter with a signal-to-noise-ratio that’s a game-changer.
New York Marketing Copywriter Woman: I’m not sure what you’re saying.
Marketing Manager: Me neither. Like I said, I’m super busy.
New York Marketing Copywriter Woman: Okay. Maybe you can tell me a little about your competitors?
Marketing Manager: I already told you, we’re the leading provider of integrated solutions that cut through the clutter with a signal-to-noise-ratio that’s a game-changer.
New York Marketing Copywriter Woman: Right then. So who are your customers?
Marketing Manager: Customers?
New York Marketing Copywriter Woman: Yes. The people you sell to. Any thoughts about your product fulfilling their needs? Pain points? Hopes and dreams?
Marketing Manager: Are you some kind of religious fanatic? What the hell? What are you talking about?
New York Marketing Copywriter Woman To writer persuasive copy, I need to understand your customers.
Marketing Manager: Whoa. Hold on. Our website is about us, not our customers.
New York Marketing Copywriter Woman: So let me see if I understand. You want me to write web content that enhances company image, blasts sales and boosts your bottom line. But you don’t want it to focus on your customers.
Marketing Manager: You got it. Nice wrap up. (Phone rings) I’d better take this call. Shoot me a bid. (He picks up phone and speaks into the receiver:) Hello, Carlo?
Would you take this copywriting job?
New York Marketing Copywriter Woman can’t “shoot” a bid to the Marketing Manager. She doesn’t have enough information to price the project–let along write it.
She’ll email the Marketing Manager and ask for company collateral and white papers to see if she can get the answers she needs. But prospects don’t look good.
New York Marketing Copywriter Woman will probably walk away from this project. What would you do?
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Definitely walk away! I’m a patient person and I need the work, but I can’t cope with clients like that. They inevitably make you feel either worthless or enraged and neither of those sit well with me!
Don’t walk. RUN!
Very entertaining, Lorraine. If only it weren’t true!
Nifty media thingy you’ve used, too. Never seen the like of it.
I always learn something from your posts.
Many thanks! P.
@Friya: Yes, indeed. Better to pour energy into other projects–or self-marketing that cultivates like-minded clients.
@Paul: Thanks for your kind words. The media is a (ostensibly) easy-to-use text-to-animation software. Now we can all be cartoon auteurs!
I’d run. Fast. In the opposite direction.
When they say they’re the “leading” anything, I screw on my skeptical face.
When they can’t say in simple terms what they’re selling, I think they’re joking.
When they ignore the customer’s needs for their own, I run.
I love the part about the website being about them and not their customers. Sad, but too true. I think I would be running away.
I LOVED this … reminds me, Lorraine, of that little project of ours that fell through – “We don’t need any SEO. We have no competition. Our market is every woman. PR will drive sales.”
@Lori It’s surprising how many internal marketers ignore the basics–”Who is my customer? Who are my competitors? How can I differentiate myself.” Perhaps they’re so close to their product thay can’t muster objectivity.
@Sharla Yeah–unfortunately that little anecdote comes right from life. I’ve had conversations drop into uncomfortable silence more than once after saying, “So tell me about your customer.”
@Roberta: Thanks for the kind words. As you well know, Marketers’ Myopia runs rampant. : >
Lorraine! That’s a really great video… I’ll send it to my copywriter-hubby… He’ll SO appreciate it! Meanwhile, I wish I could make your NY Copywriter Woman a good cup of hot cocoa spiked with a little cognac so she can make her exit with gusto!